Saints Row 2: Corporate Warfare (Xbox 360) review "Silence, brand!"

Somewhere in the depths of my mind was a nagging voice telling me not to heed my gut on Saints Row 2: Corporate Warfare. Never mind that sour taste in my mouth left by Ultor Exposed, this one will be better. And besides, it's $3 cheaper!

It beckoned further, telling me about the impressive array of Movember mustaches, new costumes I could don, and new vehicles for splattering passers-by. I entertained the idea of tearing down the road in a old gangster car while wearing a barbarian getup, my gnarly mustache striking fear into the hearts of the soon-to-be-trampled. For $7 I could be a walking Amon Amarth song, and that was almost enough to sell the package. However, I remembered the 'Oops' from the last DLC, namely the stale missions. That sneaky devilish voice told me it couldn't be any worse than before, and besides, what was I going to do with that $7 except waste it on Qdoba and make my ass larger?

So there my $7 went. MSP added and used, and no turning back.

My first glimpse of mission number one revives subpar DLC flashbacks in yet another rail shooter. Perched on a helicopter, I had to defend a limo from the authorities, blasting away myriad enemy choppers and police cruisers. Yet something was different. The AI was more aggressive, the enemies more ever-present. It wasn't a few cops at a time, but the whole of Stillwater PD coming at you with a vengeance. This wasn't your typical rail shooter mission, but a furious ride along the interstate. It managed to capture Saints Row's own brand of violent magic.

Finish the mission and it's on to the power plant. The first half casts shades of Saints Row 2's main campaign, in particular the only problem I had with it. Here and there are various instances of the 'kill X enemies' objective, rehashed one last time. After that, you take to a helicopter and defend fuel trucks from RPG-toting menaces and crazed enemy vehicles. One must be careful when firing a homing missile not to take out the fuel truck as well. You had to be vigilant, quick and precise. Miss too often or take too long to kill your targets and KA-BOOM goes the truck. Even though I swore repeatedly and wanted to tear my skin off, I eventually ended the mission satisfied. Wiping the sweat off my brow and cutting loose a relieved WOO, I thought, "Why couldn't Ultor Exposed have had missions like this?"

Corporate Warfare unfortunately terminates its stay too early, cutting off after the third mission. And man, what a mission it is! Guided by a new character, your objective is to snipe various targets around the docks district, taking out an obnoxious helicopter rider, joggers, bikers, a man in a hot dog suit, and even mimes and ninjas. Dispatching the bikers was especially difficult. If you fail to snipe them before they exit stage left, then your mission was a failure. Sniping missions were not touched on much in Saints Row 2, so it's great to have a DLC mission that wasn't overused in the campaign. Really, isn't that what DLC packages should feature, great ideas that didn't make it into the campaign?

The reward for your troubles: another lame cutscene that begs for further development of a certain character from the original Saints. Sadly, Volition has pretty much dropped the character and rendered any of Corporate Warfare's offerings to the canon pointless. There's always a chance he'll reappear in future DLC, but not likely.

The lack of missions combined with the dull ending leaves you hungering, but not as terribly as before. The additions are more worth your money, and this DLC doesn't feel like a cleverly disguised advertisement for an upcoming Volition title. Ultimately, what should decide whether or not you purchase Corporate Warfare is how much you enjoyed Saints Row 2. Unless you're a huge fan, put that money away and pick up something more worth your while. Otherwise, it's a worthy purchase with great extras and fun missions, what few there are.

Community review by JoeTheDestroyer (December 10, 2011) Rumor has it that Joe is not actually a man, but a machine that likes video games, horror movies, and long walks on the beach. His/Its first contribution to HonestGamers was a review of Breath of Fire III.