Welcome to my blog. Here, you may read all of my reviews. That will take a good deal of time, as I have penned quite a large number of them. I advise you to start now. And don't forget, constantly offer me praise concerning how great I am at doing what I do!
Title: With a little over a week before the ABC deadline..... Posted: December 14, 2007 (12:35 PM)
I am WOEFULLY behind on my Lufia: Ruins of Lore progress! Chalk it up to me doing a lot of in-office work, finalizing what's been an ungodly long dissolution from my ex-wife (where she finally signed the fucking papers today after over a year!) and partying a lot with it being my birthday this week (Wednesday, for those of you wishing to send me belated gifts).
But never fear! I got a friend's birthday tomorrow, so we'll be partying all day then, but I will be using a good chunk o' next week to ensure that this is the year I finally win this tournament! Or stab Blu in the neck for being the "sudden-death" judge that awarded EmP the tiebreaker vote over me last year, preventing me from meeting my true destiny! Or, even better, do both!
I have a foolproof plan.
STEP ONE: Focus more on the game so that even if I haven't beat it when it comes time to write my review, I still will have experienced enough to have a vast array of experiences to talk about in my review.
STEP TWO: Write a kickass review (ie: one where I don't use variations of the word "experience" twice in the same sentence like I did in describing my first step).
STEP THREE: Wait for the glowing critiques and really high scores given to me by the judges.
STEP FOUR: Make a half-hearted attempt at humility with the obligatory thanking of the judges and other competitors before boasting for 15 paragraphs about how not even the gods themselves can stop me now.
Simple, yet foolproof.
User: Felix_Arabia Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (12:47 PM)
Huh, based on your outline, I give the review a 95/100.
User: EmP Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (03:58 PM)
Good luck, buddy. If anyone deserves a big win, it's you.
Which is why it's going to be heartbreaking when I beat you like I usually do. I'm pulling for you, though, man!
User: pup Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (07:22 PM)
Seeing as how I saw no step involving the bribing of judges, you are screwed.
User: Genj Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (07:36 PM)
My plan is a little different:
Step 1: Eat a stick of butter.
Step 2: Write something while listening to Jedi Mind Tricks.
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Profit!!
User: Felix_Arabia Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (08:26 PM)
Genjuro, I think you should dip your stick of butter into some Crisco prior to eating it.
User: Genj Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (08:50 PM)
I will. Then I'll deep fry it.
User: wolfqueen001 Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (09:15 PM)
XD Wow. Talk about a heart attack...
User: Felix_Arabia Title: Posted: December 14, 2007 (09:53 PM)
That might be more disgusting than deep fat fried Snickers bar.
Opinions expressed in this blog represent the opinions of those expressing them and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of site staff, users and/or sponsors. Unless otherwise stated, content above belongs to its copyright holders and may not be reproduced without express written permission.