I'm sure you've all been on the edges of your seats, and I'm proud to report that I've just written an introductory paragraph to my first review in... well, a while.

Uh, yeah. >_>

Feeling a bit stupid? Positive that the best way to fix your stupidity is with a videogame? Well then I suppose that Brain Age 2 would be one of your best options. But if you feel nice and smart, then there's an overbearing chance that you'll hate this game. If not right away, then in a few weeks. Why? It just gets boring and frustrating, that's why. I know it is an "educational" game, but it falls short even for this category with its lack of variety, overall brevity, and mind-numbing fl...

Many gamers consider Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3 to be the best in the series. Its well-designed levels, many goals, great soundtrack and cool secret areas kept Playstation gamers happy. But I’m sure only a few of those happy gamers purchased the GBA version of it. Lucky them. The GBA game is like a dumbed-down, uglier version of the original. Sometimes the levels are similar to the Playstation levels, other times they’re only vaguely based on them. Sometimes the goals are the same, other times the...

Ride with me for a moment, back to freshman biology in high school. It was a time when little else caught my attention beyond the hot brunette that sat next to me. A time when little effort was needed to be exerted to pass a class. A time when Fridays were dissection days. With a double period specifically assigned to slicing open deceased creatures and exploring the innards, not even the hot brunette could distract me (well, maybe just a little but it was time well spent). But this story is not...

"Hey, you know, that Banjo game with the bear and the bird did pretty good on the N64."

Meet Dizzy. Dizzy is an egg. Dizzy comes from Yolkfolk village. Dizzy has an egg girlfriend (hot, I know) named Daisy. On one eggcelent day (I'm sorry, really I am), they discovered a secret entrance to the evil wizard Zak's castle. Little did they know, Zak himself was watching them through his crystal ball! He set a trap for them in the form of a horrible, awful, terrifying, spinning wheel (DUN DUN DUUUN!). It mysteriously spun infinitely due the magic spell placed on it by the wizard. ...

I love the old West. You know why? Because everyone just shot everyone else all the time. Okay, so maybe actually being in the time period wouldn't be the best thing, as I'm not a big fan of being shot. Shooting other people though, is a different story. Bank Panic allows me to shoot all the outlaws I want as they pop into the bank and try to grab some cash. I sit down and wait for the action to unfold, then I must shoot at the right time at the right person. I can see three of the twelve...

You know what Tetris is. Yes, you. I'm talking directly to you, reader, the one on the other side of the computer screen. I can say this with certainty because if you're on this website, reading this review right now, the chances of you not having played one of the millions of Tetris spawn are treading on nothing. In the very least, I'm sure you've seen Human Tetris (and if you haven't check it out because it's hilarious). Anyway, bec...

It's quite a bold statement to say something is perfect. This is obviously because there are few things on this planet that we can say honestly have no flaws. One of these things, of course, would be a fresh roasted s'more. Another might be Maria Sharapova's body. One thing that we can definitely rule out as perfect though, is Perfect Bowling on the NES. The title isn't so much a bold statement as a dirty lie. This game isn't even worth the title Good Bowling or Mediocre Bowling...

Let me start off by asking a simple question. Do you enjoy stabbing yourself in the eyes with pointy things? If you answered "No" to the above question, there's a great chance that the pain suffered in this game will not appeal to you. If you said "Yes", well then boy have I found a game for you: horrible eye pain, and no sharp objects required! See, the game is a plain, black backdrop with a tiny white maze in front. There is two entrances/exits in the maze: one for you and one for the computer...

It's a future day. As a Marine for Union Aerospace Corporation, or UAC, you're no pushover. You walk with purpose wherever you go, flexing as many muscles as possible. On the job one day, you hear a rumor that the Mars moonbase is having problems. This is somewhat surprising, as ever since its establishment, it had been surprisingly well-kept with few if any issues. As you hear more of the story, you realize that this is serious. Marines and scientists at the base are being slaughtered by hellis...