Forums > Contributor Zone > Review of the Week April 27-May 3: Joe Unleashed

So my RotW is very late; it usually isn't, but it is this time. My bad -- life and all that. Also, as is becoming a theme, my RotW is stacked. And as always, that makes me happy and sad. (Mostly sad.) Also, it's mostly Joe's fault. With his holdovers taken into consideration, he accounts for more than half the week's reviews. The hell is he doing??


A Hat in Time (Switch)
mariner
Mariner jumps right in with his review, maybe a bit too quickly after a very quick intro sentence. But then the review goes on for longer than I thought it would. That said, it's a great review, bursting with enthusiasm for the subject matter. And we could use a good praise review in a week of trash jobs and write-ups for mediocre titles. The ending especially, is fantastic.


Avenging Spirit (Game Boy)
Jason Venter
This is a bash review, but Jason doesn't seem to take much pleasure in ripping the game as others have done with their bash works, even this week. He sounds reluctant, and frankly, a little bored with his rundown of the game's deficiencies. Also, the typical Venter 'flow' doesn't seem quite on point here. At this level, all the reviews are good of course, but this isn't my favourite Venter review.

Alleyway (Game Boy)
Jason Venter
In his second bash job of the week, Jason takes an old GameBoy cart to task in more than competent fashion. It's a much better review to read than his other offering; it's clear and flows well and does a good job bashing an old game, not just for being old, but because it was never good, and is even less good now. While the review does feel a tiny bit dry and perhaps a beat or two too long for what it does, it wears a bit of wit which I rather enjoyed.


NIER (Xbox 360)
Rob Hamilton
After an startlingly good opening paragraph, I had some issues with Rob's review thereafter. The first is the repeating "Nier, a father trying desperately to protect his sickly daughter..." paragraph. Don't worry--I blame Jason for allowing this error to make it past The Room. My more important complaint is that you basically say the game's just about ideal if you beat it twice (or less). It's the multiple play throughs beyond that that dull the experience. I don't know that this is a reasonable take; when did we start holding games to a standard this high?


Viking: Sigurd's Adventure (PC)
Gary Hartley
Gary's review is cursed because it's about a dull, mediocre game. However, he manages to lift his review with a very good opening paragraph and another good passage about microtransactions. It's well written, but most of the other reviews this week are--it's the clever bits and humour which help this one rise above much of the fray.


Streets of Rage 4 (PlayStation 4)
pickhut
I have this game and plan to review it, so I'm right with you on most of your analysis. The review is well written as usual, and gets right to its points, which are all legit, but it feels a bit short (irony of ironies, me saying that) and ends a bit abruptly, I felt. I also would have liked to see what you thought of it compared to more recent beat-em-ups, like Double Dragon 4, and Double Dragon: Neon (which you just reviewed) for example.


JOE'S CORNER


The Uncanny X-Men (NES)
This is a great bash review. Joe doesn't seem to relish ripping the game, but isn't shy about it either. It sports an ideal opening paragraph and argument about the game being the wrong genre entirely (not that being the right one would have saved it). Love the bit about passing the joint around. It's an ideal length and flows perfectly throughout. Nice job.

Mega Man II (Game Boy)
This one takes a bit longer getting going, but once it does, it's hard to find fault with. A nice breakdown of this sequel's failings, culminating in a great line which sums up the entire experience exceptionally well: "Mega Man II is a mediocre platformer that serves as a feeble retrospective for two superior titles."

Everdark Tower (Switch)
Where Joe talks about a dull game, and seems rather disinterested himself (though who can blame him?). He analyzes the rather mediocre affair expertly, but ultimately can't quite manage to elevate the subject matter, which, to be fair, isn't always possible.

Keatz: The Lonely Bird review (PC)
This review wasn't as smooth as the others, probably due in part to the game's flaws being at odds with one another: the game can be super easy as you stand back and unload bullets from a distance, but it also has bad controls and offers only one life per continue which is frustrating. This sentence seems to be missing something: "You not only need to tread carefully here, but do so at a pace that run down the timer." The weakest of the Joe batch.

Aldred: Knight of Honor review (SWITCH)
Great Groundhog Day motif; it's one I can definitely relate to. Good breakdown of a small, forgettable game that kills you a lot and is slow about it, which is a pretty unsavory double-whammy. You point out that while the game has some nice assets, it repeats them ad nauseam which... well, why bother?

And so:


THIRD PLACE
Viking: Sigurd's Adventure (PC) by Gary Hartley

SECOND PLACE
A Hat in Time (Switch) by mariner

REVIEW OF THE WEEK
The Uncanny X-Men (NES) by Joe

It was a tough call. Apologies if you were shafted. See you in a month, if the plague doesn't see you first!

I don't have to prove I'm refined - that's what makes me refined!

Streets of Rage 4 is such a straightforward game that I legitimately had trouble adding anything else of merit to the review without risk of making it come off as fluff. But that's what I also liked about the experience: it was simple, energetic, and to the point without much nonsensical issues thrown into it. Interestingly, I originally thought the game was average at best after the first playthough and planned on giving it a 3/5. But it grew on me on repeat plays, and it went up to a 3.5/5, until I felt it deserved a 4/5 in the final version of the review.

I actually almost mentioned a Double Dragon game in the review though: Wander of the Dragons. But I held off on that, because I didn't want readers to get the idea that the lack of invincibility frames were as bad as in that game.

Thanks for the comments, and I look forward to seeing your take on the game. Also a congrats to Joe on RotW!

I head spaceshit noises.

Thanks for the topic, Marc, and for the comments on my reviews. I was back from a bit of a hiatus, with a lot going on in my life, so the reviews didn't represent my best work but hopefully did the games they covered justice. I don't generally write with an eye toward winning high RotW placement, just covering games competently (and sometimes, that gets me a nod). So this time around, it was good just to be back in the mix. Hopefully, I'm not far away from being able to jump in again more frequently, but only time will tell. Congrats to those who placed this week, and thanks to all who contributed!

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto on secret doors to another world2

Thank you for the topic, the win and for going through all of those reviews. I've been dumping a lot lately, and I really appreciate you going through all of them.

And I blame EmP for Keatz, because that was one of the games he gave me with his little grab bag thing. I've yet to earn a game from that offer that I'd score higher than 1/5.

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.

Sadly I can't blame Jason for that because, due to his moving process, I just posted it after a bit in the waiting room for the dual purpose of giving him one less thing to work on and to prevent my stuff from being backed up.

Also sadly, that dual paragraph bit you mentioned was purely my idea and I liked it, so bad call on my part!

As for the other part, maybe I could have explained it better, but it comes more down to actual game content being hidden behind so much repetitive busy-work, to where you have to make it through things three times in order to see the true final boss and four times to see everything. It's a fun game to play, but doesn't have the depth to hold up under that much playing. I guess another way to phrase it is that this game wound up in that awkward area where I liked it enough to want to keep playing until I saw all the endings, but due to the repetitiveness, I spent a good deal of that time wondering why I made that decision.

I'm not afraid to die because I am invincible
Viva la muerte, that's my goddamn principle

And I blame EmP for Keatz, because that was one of the games he gave me with his little grab bag thing. I've yet to earn a game from that offer that I'd score higher than 1/5.

You were happy to pull that game. "It's not pulled from stores and has some good reviews!", you said. How quick you change your tune.

This is a mammoth topic, Marc, and well worth the wait. I appreciate the nod to my goofy little review, and offer congrats to Mariner and Joe. Who should both take another random Steam game that might not be awful but almost certainly will. You all should!

For us. For them. For you.

How many of those do you have left, anyway?

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto on secret doors to another world2

I'm not even close to empty yet.

Go spread the word. The evil, malicious word.

For us. For them. For you.