Forums > Contributor Zone > RotW // 5 - 11th December // The Backslash Edition

I guess that post horror slump is over, then?

Special Notes:

Pick is DISQUALIFIED because I was momentarily very excited that someone else was reviewing a 32X game and lived in hope that I might see the back of that bloody project as such. But, no. Genesis version. Still, it was a solid review talking about a bravely made game that was considered obsolete almost immediately. Shame it’s DISQUALIFIED.

Jason nearly got the win simply for the awesome glimpse into his life. While the rest of us were being edgy, rebellious teenagers out to show THE MAN that we knew best, he was ignoring massive Nintendo franchises (which, if you know Jason, would have been the deepest cut of all) because some guy he didn’t know said it was evil in church. The ending line gave me the hardest laugh I’ve had all week. And I’ve been watching small children fall over on an ice puddle outside my window for hours.



THIRD Evil Dead: Regeneration [PC] Rob

The more time I spend with the other games in the failed Team Deadite project (Boo to Joe. Boo!) the more I think my clumsy but heartfelt and extremely dated survival horror original might have actually been the pick of the bunch. This sounds like a doomed project from the start: why would you take a cult icon like Ash and relegate him to moody straight man? It’s spectacularly dumb. But then tying that into a tired concept and hitting the copy and paste button is a real waste of the license. At least there’s that TV show now to remind us how the formula should work.

The game’s masterfully picked apart here, the focus is right on point on tearing out the stupid and lazy ideas that somehow turn a sure winner into a flop. I think the last few lines talking about how the films were low budget but still not amateurish was an especially strong close.


SECOND Breath of Fire [SNES] Joe

It’s been a fair few years since I played this one, so it’s nice to get a little memory jog on how it’s actually not that great. And that Jade was a name they thought suitable for a guy… huh.

I remember this game getting an awful translation (it was that bloody Ted Woosley again!) which is the official excuse for some many bad enemy names and such, as they had to write them from scratch to fit in with the character limits which has less space due to the switch from Japanese to English script. True nerd story; useless crap like that just lives in my head.

ANYWAY. A lot of good lines exist in this review, the best of which is the one that suggests you’ll struggle to recall any of the game’s big plot points after sometime away. I smugly thought I had you at one point, but realised the few things I’d recalled where actually from BoFII -- which means you were right. You also effectively put the game’s annoying quest ramble to sword. But still take time to point out sporadic highlights, like the awesome Mote fight, making your review an even-handed piece.

PS: leaving BoFV out of the closing line was harsh. That game was pretty good. Just crazy weird.


WINNER! Final Fantasy XV [PC] Zachary Walton

You say ‘A joy to…’ a lot. Seems like something an editor should have been catching. Maybe someone told him in church that removing repetitive phrasing was inherently unholy…

I represent that section of gamers that are so, like, done with Final Fantasy, but still manage to crawl back to the game when they’re releases (though I’ve not beaten one since X - so there!) and so a lot of the noise about a clumsy switch to an ARPG and the downright hostile response to the demos garnered were smugly met by me. As such, I appreciate that this review take a quick time out to address these things and put me back in my place. It’s all not as bad as it seemed. Gotcha.

At the same time, talking about how the game has its flaws and that the long development cycle has clearly left some scars is clever reviewing. These are things that need pointing out, but what this review does well is pepper criticism and praise throughout rather than lumping them together and having you argue with yourself.

For us. For them. For you.

My intro was originally a whole paragraph longer, going into more detail and explaining that my mom was more receptive to the guest speaker's sermon than I was. I was pretty much doomed any time a speaker talked about things I liked, because I always liked evil things with magic or monsters or whatever and my mom was half convinced that the entertainment industry is all about leading souls astray, rather than just making a bunch of money. I decided that while people might tolerate some reminiscing, two paragraph's worth as any intro was crossing the line.

Thanks for pushing out the topic in a timely manner. I do have one suggestion, though: update your template so that it specifically ranks the reviews with some convenient text. With different authors contributing to RotW (thank you, all of you!), I sometimes have a hard time telling who actually won if there isn't a label attached to each review stating its placement.

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto on secret doors to another world2

Drat! I should have mentioned the 32X replay music in my review! Surely, that would have made it RotW material.

But congrats to the top placers, OD, Joe, and Phazonmasher!

I head spaceshit noises.

Thank you for the placement, and congrats to the winners.

Also, I left Breath of Fire: Dragon Quarter out because I haven't played it and it would be dishonest of me to say one way or another if it were good. It's a polarizing game, from what I've gathered, and I'd like to actually tear into it before giving my $0.02.

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.