Forums > Contributor Zone > RotW -- July 4-10, 2016 -- A good group, a great judge (stop laughing)

I'm pretty sure it's my week to do this again, so let's see what sort of stuff I'm reading this week. I'll laugh, I'll cry, I'll wonder why I'm doing this instead of playing Doom 2. Speaking of which, since it's been a while since I've played it, I'd forgotten just how awesome THE TENEMENTS (L17) is. For most of the level, every time you do virtually anything, some door will open somewhere and most of the time, something will start shooting at you. Keeps ya on your toes, it does!

In technical stuff, looks like Joe had a review last week, so it gets added to the count, giving us a total of eight reviews by seven people. None of those are mine due to one of those summer bursts of writer's block, commonly known as "the weather is beautiful, so I'd rather sit on a porch and drink beer than write stuff" syndrome.

THIRD PLACE

joethedestroyer's Garshasp: The Monster Slayer (PC)

Hoo-boy, man, just the title of this game reeks of "generic hack-and-slash". I mean, "Garshasp"? It took me three tries just to type that without screwing up at least one letter. Damn stupid barbarian names… This was a really good week for reviews with just about every non-mentioned one being in strong contention for a place on the board. What put you a step ahead of the pack was just how good of a job you did communicating how this is (at best) a second-rate rip-off of God of War. From the "God of Bore" tagline to all the mentions of the mechanics and plot and how there's this sense that it could have been something if a little more effort was put into things. I liked where you mentioned this positive (a really cool city/swamp monster area) right after talking about how the part where the hero's brother dies has no impact whatsoever because the game treated it like nothing special happened. That just illustrates how any potential the game had was left unfulfilled due to laziness.

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SECOND PLACE

Rhody Tobin's SteamWorld Heist (PlayStation 4)

This game sounds pretty cool and interesting. I'd say the best part of it is just how you explain so much in a fairly brief amount of time. The combat system, characters and their abilities, controls (especially that part where you can't undo moves before actually acting; that is definitely different than other tactical games I've played) and so on. I finished this review feeling I knew a good bit about a game I knew nothing about previously. I mean, it's hard to say much more. You covered all the bases and did so with brevity in a manner I found engaging. Good enough for me!

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REVIEW OF THE WEEK (aka: Overdrive Place)

EmP's Vegas Casino High 5! (DS)

This review made me laugh. Repeatedly. And therefore it won. This was just a great bash review that made me glad that the most casino-ish stuff I've done in video games is hitting up the various ones in places like a Dragon Warrior game to play the slots…or that damn monster fighting game where you could find a way to lose if you picked the game's final boss to take on a damn slime. No, I'm not bitter about losing all my hard-earned gold trying to win that one good weapon!

Uh, anyway, this game seems like a hilarious disaster. The highlight of the review was the part talking about how poorly its attempt to shoehorn in all the DS' gimmicks worked. Especially the voice commands part. Seems that even if this was a good casino simulator, the inability to clearly tell it what you want to do would be a deal-breaker. Since it seems like communicating "fourteen black" might have caused you a bit of a breakdown. Man, I could read reviews like this all day without being (overly) resentful about it!

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And that's that for that. Tune in next week when someone else does this.

I'm not afraid to die because I am invincible
Viva la muerte, that's my goddamn principle

Congratulations to the winners, none of whom are me. Nice job on the quick turnaround, too!

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto on secret doors to another world2

Congrats to the winners, one of whom is me. Fine work, Rob. Thank you for the kind words.

I'm willing to post my copy of Vegas High 5! to anyone who would like to play it next.

For us. For them. For you.

Gratz to the winners. A lot of good competition this week. Not surprised that the Vegas Casino High 5 review took the win; it was just too funny.

Thank you for the placement! I'm glad you enjoyed the review. As for the warrior's name, blame Persian myth. Garshasp was a Perisan folk hero, similar in some ways to Hercules.

Congrats to the winners, and thank you, OD, for doing this topic.

The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.