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Forums > Submission Feedback > Suskie's Portal review

This thread is in response to a review for Portal on the Miscellaneous. You are encouraged to view the review in a new window before reading this thread.

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Author: espiga
Posted: September 23, 2008 (11:14 AM)
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This review was a triumph.


Your girlfriend's name ends in .jpg


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Author: Suskie
Posted: September 23, 2008 (01:04 PM)
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Should I note that it's a HUGE SUCCESS?


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: Lewis
Posted: September 23, 2008 (01:54 PM)
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Congratulations for completing this review, even in a situation of extreme pessimism.


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Author: dragoon_of_infinity
Posted: September 23, 2008 (02:33 PM)
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It's hard to overstate my satisfaction after reading this review.


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Author: bluberry
Posted: September 23, 2008 (02:38 PM)
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all your base are belong to us


Oh no, it's a Goomba!


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Author: Suskie
Posted: September 23, 2008 (03:01 PM)
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LEEROY JENKINS


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: WilltheGreat
Posted: September 23, 2008 (04:52 PM)
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I commend you on doing what you must, because you can, for the good of all of us.


"Either, sir, you're an ass or you're masquerading as one."
- Nero Wolfe


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Author: Suskie
Posted: September 23, 2008 (09:05 PM)
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Now that we've gotten all of this out of our system, does anyone have anything to say about this review? There are people who are obviously tired of hearing about the Portal, and I tried to play off that in my review though I think the point comes across as a little too obvious. Thoughts on how I could fix this? Or is it okay the way it is? I live and breathe off your advice, my friends!


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: Lewis
Posted: September 24, 2008 (02:52 AM)
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I really like it. It falls more into the category of what I'd consider a 'retrospective' rather than a review per se, as you acknowledge early on that everyone knows all about Portal now anyway, so it's better to analyse what made it quite so magical when it was released last year. And it was magical. I think it took a while for it to dawn on me just how brilliant it is. I remember playing it for the first time and thinking, yeah, this is a solid, inventive puzzle game with a brilliant, kooky script. Then I tried to think of things that had done it anywhere near as well... and there's nothing. Nothing's come close. Nothing's even tried.

It's short but engrossing. It's silly but all the more wonderful for it. It has the most incredible villain in a game since Shock 2, yet it's absolutely hilarious throughout. The ending is still one of my favourite gaming moments, ever, and it's a credits sequence.

Good work. You do it some lovely justice.


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Author: arkrex
Posted: September 24, 2008 (03:36 AM)
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You can't spell ignorant without IGN


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Author: dagoss
Posted: September 24, 2008 (07:06 AM)
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I think the stance you took is a good one, and one I probably wouldn't have considered. It's hard to review something that has such an overpowering status in Internet culture, but I think this was a good way to approach it. If I was to write a Portal review, it would probably be nothing but GLaDOS quotes haphazardly strung together.


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Author: Suskie
Posted: September 24, 2008 (09:38 AM)
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Yeah, the tough part about writing a Portal review is that you can't treat it like some "new" game that no one's played, even though the game's only about a year old now. It's so over-covered and over-quoted on so many levels that you have to take a different approach. Glad to hear that this one seems to have worked.


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: Halon
Posted: September 24, 2008 (10:05 AM)
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Sorry if my response is slow, I haven't been around the site much in the past few days. I prefer your Half Life 2 reviews primarily because of the reason you just said but thought this one was very good as well. There wasn't much to work with that already hasn't been said but this is one of the better reviews for the game that I've read. I would've been a bit harder on the game but this is done way better than my half-written review that is not likely to ever be finished could possibly turn out.


IF YOU WANT MORE BEATS FOR YOUR BUCK THERE'S NO LUCK.


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Author: disco1960
Posted: September 24, 2008 (06:43 PM)
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Apparently, I'm one of the few who didn't know anything about Portal; I thought the cake thing was from Bioshock for some reason.

The review is still very easy to understand, although that introduction was an odd surprise--I don't think you need to stress the "yeah, yeah, everyone already heard of it" point as much, but that could be just me.


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Author: Lewis
Posted: March 26, 2009 (05:43 AM)
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Reading this again now, this is what I wish I'd written about Portal. 8/10? What the hell was I thinking?


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Author: Suskie
Posted: March 26, 2009 (07:17 AM)
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Good question. Did you notice I changed my own rating? (This was originally a 9/10 review.)


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: Masters (Mod)
Posted: March 26, 2009 (07:21 AM)
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Brilliant review, Mike.

One catch:

"Which serves no useless purpose, of course, but is still fun in its own retarded way."

"Useful," probably. Though probably, the word could be omitted altogether?

Metric assload, ha nice.


I don't have to prove I'm refined - that's what makes me refined!


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Author: Suskie
Posted: March 26, 2009 (07:26 AM)
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Ah, thanks for that. See, I make mistakes that Microsoft Word doesn't catch.


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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