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Forums > Submission Feedback > tomchick's Duke Nukem Forever review

This thread is in response to a review for Duke Nukem Forever on the Miscellaneous. You are encouraged to view the review in a new window before reading this thread.

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Author: fleinn
Posted: June 16, 2011 (01:50 PM)
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"underdeveloped exercise in shovelware that looks and plays like something an Eastern European developer you'd never heard of might have sold for $9.99"

..you know, like... Vietcong, or Arx Fatalis, or Nexus: The Jupiter Incident, or.. :p

Good review. Like the opening a lot. And the ending.. and the bits in between.. But if you started explaining the meta-setup for the game in the third paragraph as if we didn't already know who Duke Nukem is, it would have been more effective, I think. Would have broken things up a bit as well. "Blabla, titular hero created at Epic labs", etc..


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Author: sashanan
Posted: June 16, 2011 (02:00 PM)
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I was pretty sure that DNF at the very least would be a letdown to some and quite possibly to most. I suppose I didn't expect it to suck as bad as the reviews almost universally appear to point out. Even development hell can hardly excuse what happened here.


''Yes, yes...but apart from all that, Mrs Lincoln, how was the play?''


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Author: Halon
Posted: June 16, 2011 (04:18 PM)
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Good review. This is pretty much getting bashed everywhere, though fans of the original games (especially 3D) aren't completely hating it. It's a poor game either way, but if you're a fan of the old games I hear it's a poor game that is still somewhat amusing and worth checking out (perhaps for a reduced price).


IF YOU WANT MORE BEATS FOR YOUR BUCK THERE'S NO LUCK.


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Author: zigfried (Mod)
Posted: June 16, 2011 (09:08 PM)
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I just picked this game up today. Looking forward to playing it!


Unlimited Zig Works!


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Author: JoeTheDestroyer
Posted: June 16, 2011 (11:07 PM)
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Oh, goodie! Another new game to add to the "bargain bin only" list.


The only thing my milkshake brings to the yard is a subpoena.


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Author: jerec
Posted: June 17, 2011 (08:23 AM)
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Duke Nukem Forever is a cicada. Spends 14 years underground, and when it finally emerges, it lives for a short time and then dies.


I can avoid death by not having a life.


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Author: Suskie
Posted: June 17, 2011 (08:54 AM)
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^^^ And it's ugly and horrible.

I rented this game last night to satisfy my morbid curiosity.


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: JokerRulez
Posted: June 17, 2011 (10:43 AM)
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Regarding the comment Duke made at the top of the building.

In Texas they have a joke regarding restrooms, that all the men's urinals are hung low to the ground. This is a reference to the size and length of the men's "equipment" in Texas. They need lots of room to "swing" so to speak.

The Duke standing on top of a building in Vegas stating he can see his entire dick up there is likely a reference.

This is actually funny if you get the reference, as are most jokes. However, it looks like the joke is on us for this game. Too bad. Would have loved to have bought a quality retro package. Retro garbage is not worth it.

--JokerRulez


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Author: Suskie
Posted: June 17, 2011 (11:05 AM)
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If that particular joke is from Texas, then how is Duke's line a reference to that if he's in Vegas (which is in Nevada)?


You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.


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Author: JokerRulez
Posted: June 17, 2011 (01:11 PM)
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The location has nothing to do with the joke.

Not much of a joke either, though I believe that is the reference they were shooting for.

--JokerRulez


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Author: WhisperingMadness
Posted: June 17, 2011 (01:36 PM)
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I hope you rented it at a redbox, Suskie, so you didn't waste too much money.


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Author: WhisperingMadness
Posted: June 17, 2011 (01:40 PM)
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Sorry. I know this has nothing to do with the topic, but is there a way I can get rid of the ugly cheetos?


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Author: EmP (Mod)
Posted: June 17, 2011 (01:41 PM)
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Click the ugly cheetos to open new ugly avatar options.


For us. For them. For you.


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Author: WhisperingMadness
Posted: June 17, 2011 (01:48 PM)
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Nice. Thank you.


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Author: zippdementia
Posted: June 18, 2011 (02:04 PM)
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Suckiness is really sucky. I cannot express enough how disappointed I am that this game is terrible. It's so cliche to release a terrible game after years in production hell. I just wish that, for once, production hell would actually be worth it.

Like Batman Begins. That was worth the wait for another batman film.


Note to gamers: when someone shoots you in the face, they aren't "gay." They are "psychopathic."


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