Forums > Contributor Zone > RotW June 15th-21st. Because EmP said so.

I’ve watched now as the other staffers got easy weeks on this before deciding the time was right to drop myself back into the RotW rotation. I saw weeks with only three reviews subbed, weeks with clear and undisputed winners and weeks where the top three where as obvious as OD’s wine glass is huge. So, I make my return and faced the hardest week I’d ever come up against.

My job wasn’t just about picking the top three in some cases but which review a given reviewer should lead with in the first place. It was a tough call in every aspect, and the top three are somewhat interchangeable with numerous other reviews nipping at their heels. You’ll notice that I’ve left feedback for other reviews, and this is mainly because these originally had RotW spots and I swapped them out after thought. It really was very close.

One review per person, no staff reviews, blah blah blah. Let’s do this thing:

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FIRST

DRELLA - POW

Drella teaches us a lesson here in justified anger while ripping POW to shreds. Even the scattered cursing used sparing throughout did a great job i highlighting the frustration and overall lack of foresight that the game forced upon him. I especially enjoyed the paragraph about being teased with a helicopter and a tank, thinking that a break from the never-ending flood of goons was incoming only to be presented with even more of the bugger -- that's a killer example right there.

And with an intro like the one you employed, you had to do a lot to prove that this game was awful. You did this and you did it intelligently; the tone made the review amusing, bit the strength here was the poignant examples you kept pulling out. There's no dead words anywhere, which is hard to do when you fall into a negative rant for a review.

TYPO WATCH: Last line of paragraph three should end in a question mark.

SECOND

WQ: Metal Gear Solid

I'm not a MGS fan (or, if you ask the right people, a fan of anything at all), but I'm not going to give you the clichéd praise of "your review makes me want to give the game another chance". It doesn't. I gave up at the bit where I had to go around watching guy's butts to make sure they weren't the slinky girl in disguise and I'm not going back for anyone.

But the review is a very good one for what it is: a fair look in from someone who enjoys looking at guy's pixaly arses the game more than I. And you do a good job in explaining why while still pointing out that it's got its own hosts of flaws to contend with. I liked the point about guards beaming in from nowhere once the alarm goes despite everyone in the area being killed, and kudos for not taking the easy and oft-travelled path of mocking the horny ninja like everyone else has done to death. In fact, you did pretty well in avoiding a lot of the before-mentioned aspects in a game verging on over-covered, which, in itself, is commendable. Good job: you're coming along nicely and I'm going to take full credit for it all.

THIRD

FELIX: METAL SLUG 2

“Oh No!”, scream the masses. “It’s Another Slug Review!”

The masses talk in capitals.

The reason we get a lot of reviews on Metal Slug is probably because it’s such an easy game to write about. The entire thing is packed full of examples and here young Felix does a good job pointing out the ones we’ve all heard before, but with STYLE! As I mentioned in one of the feedbacks I’ve left somewhere (I’ve left loads, making you all look like the lazy slackers you are, so I’m allowed to forget) I’m not fused about retreading covered ground as long as it’s covered well, and Felix does just that. The review feels alive at points as he throws example after example at you. Then he tells you not to play the game, which is odd, but that’s okay; MS1, which he demands you play first is a goodie, too.

But in this insistence of playing order, the conclusion feels like a let down. I didn’t come to this review for advice on my order, I came to see why I should play MS2 at all! This review, though does it’s job well, aside from wonky ending -- it makes Slug 2 sound as great as it is plus it adds another arcade review to Leroux’s tally.

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Close calls came in CJ’s surprisingly good Lemmings review, Dagoss’ heartfelt ICO review and Disco’s solid Space Invaders. Also good was a new entry from Welsh-ton with a good TWEWY review, a long-awaiting Genj piece that seemed lacking in his trademark humour and a strong Espiga return. If I’ve not mentioned you, there’s no need to fret, you got buried in reviews that, in any other week, would have walked away with a top three spot or win.

It’s like you waited for me to come back then flooded me with work. I hate you all.

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For us. For them. For you.

Awesome. Thanks EmP, and congrats to everyone else, because it was a really quality week for the site as far as submissions.

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I feel honored to not only be mentioned but to have my name completely butchered.

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'Grats to my boy Leroux for his quality victory, though I did prefer his Growl review, personally.

I'm also happy to see WQ do so well (she FINALLY placed higher than me!). Her MGS review came a long way from when she first asked me to look over it a week or so ago. The next review she subs is going to be even better. Yes, I'm putting her on the spot, haha. She'll deliver.

As for me, well, I think my 'wonky conclusion' just shows that I was getting a little burnt out from my 2-3 reviews a week shenanigans. I probably won't sub anything this week so I can let my brain rest a bit. But the next review I sub should be back on track.

Edit: RotD?

Double Edit: Haha, Dragos.

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I don't have to boost my review resume because I have real resume.

a long-awaiting Genj piece that seemed lacking in his trademark humour

Don't worry. I just finished The Bouncer.

Congrats to Drella, wolfqueen, and felix on the mentions.

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_

I'm a busy guy: I have no time for correct spellings.

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For us. For them. For you.

Thanks, EmP! Though if I had known earlier that you were doing this, I wouldn't've bothered you about it...

I don't know how you have the time, anyway. o.O

One thing, though. I gave up at the bit where I had to go around watching guy's butts to make sure they weren't the slinky girl in disguise...

XD That's the easiest part in the entire game! All you have to do is wait for the male guards to use the bathroom - one's already in there waiting for you - and either cap them with your pistol or choke them to death. Meryl will go to the other bathroom after a while.... to the lady's one. Nevermind any butt watching... XD

Anyway, thanks again; I really appreciate the comments, and for teaching me how to write these in the first place.

Congrats to Drella and Felix, too. Yay - I didn't have to wait till a day not ending in "y" to beat you after all.

Still, I thank your editing for the MGS one; couldn't have done it without you.

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What espiga does in his free time
[Eating EmP's brain] probably isn't a good idea. I mean... He's British, which means his brain's wired for PAL and your eyes are NTSC. - Will

Thought I was up for this week. I need to get the schedule straight.

Congrats to the deserving winners :)

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You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.