Forums > Submission Feedback > Suskie's Grand Theft Auto IV review

This is a good review, and now I am going to write an unrequested critique. A few lines you might want to fix:

A target was injured and in a hospital, so I donned some scrubs, put a bullet in his head, and shot through every single fed protecting him on my out back out of the facility.

Try "on my WAY back out of..." at the end there.

I participated in a back heist, pursued a pair of bikers through a subway system, kidnapped a woman, and survived more gunfights and car chases than I care to admit.

Do you mean a 'bank heist' perhaps? Because stealing someone's back seems a bit brazen, even for Grand Theft Auto.

Now, they seem like nondescript Lego towns by comparison, for the artists at Rockstar have raised the bar once more, creating, from the ground up, an environment that literally feels like a real-life location recreated in virtual form.

To properly spell "Lego" you have to capitalize each letter. Otherwise, you're just not doing it right. Small point, but I thought I'd mention it anyway.

The trouble is that these activities get old fast, and if you choose to ignore them, you’ll see be subject to annoying (and constant) calls from nagging friends inviting you to hang out.

Take 'see' out of that sentence.

Anyway, that's really about all I have to say about the review that's anything other than personal preference. You did a good job describing the game in a lively, engaging fashion and the end result is that I now want to play Grand Theft Auto IV... but of course can't, because I'm still broke as can be. When that changes, though, I think I'll buy this.

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." - John F. Kennedy on reality

"What if everything you see is more than what you see--the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things." - Shigeru Miyamoto

I actually already caught the last one, but the others I didn't see, so thanks a lot for that. I actually posted it before I proofread, thinking there was no one on at this hour anyway (it's three in the morning where I am). Just comes to show, though, that I STILL tend to miss some of my mistakes even after proofreading it.

Edit: Haha, back heist.

You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.