Review: Destiny 2 - Curse of Osiris
December 06, 2017

(HG exclusive paragraph: I did not request a whole new slot for this specifically and I have no images to accompany this. So it'll be on this blog. Mercury has an Egyptian aesthetic but it ends there despite Osiris' namesake. Mostly this is just for people who have already been playing Destiny 2.)

You can find my full review of Destiny 2 itself here, but this review will be largely story based, with some tidbits of new armor, weapons, and facts that are introduced. While there’s certainly content to be had, I gotta say; I didn’t really like the story. There will be spoilers.

The Curse of Osiris’ campaign is about three hours long depending on how killhappy you are, and if you’re grouped with people for even faster boss murder. I myself am equipped with reportedly, one of the best rocket launchers in the game that spawn cluster grenades on impact, so in my single player run through, my warlock ate through bosses like it was going out of style. Still, I found myself underwhelmed with the story as a whole. It’s true that in a game like this, the story is mostly just the framework for an otherwise enjoyable game. I am reminded by Fallout 4 which also had a pretty boring story that I didn’t care about but the setpieces themselves were fun, and that sentiment can be repeated here. You’re tasked with finding one of the first guardians named Osiris, accompanied by his unique female ghost named Sagira. So far, so simple. He’s lost in a Vex think tank type virtual zone where they have the power to split timelines around for vague goals that will ultimately lead to the death of everything. At some point it says “No light, no dark…”

However playing through all of this very quickly becomes “so far, so RPG” in the sense that objectives A through E are all filler nonsense before getting to your real goal. Y’see, it’s not as simple as just finding Osiris. Nay, he’s off doing important things that’s far to important to meet unimportant you face to important face. You never actually meet the guy until the end of the story itself, but that won’t stop Sagira or Ikora from constantly gushing about his legendary status as the guy who knows everything and is the best are Warlock-ing. In his stead are a bunch of “reflections” that pop out to help you and even speak about Osiris by name as if they are not a part of him. The idea is that he’s exploring hundreds of timelines at the same time to keep the Vex at bay while you, the hero, piddle around to try and find the boss monster that will cause all of this. But first you need to find where this boss is, because Osiris can’t for some reason.

So objective A; Find Osiris. Failed, he’s out and about. You’re tasked with navigating the ever-changing “Infinite Forest”, which basically just feels like that Pyramidion strike, same architecture and aesthetics. This also fails because you need a proper “map” to navigate his proverbial forest.

So Objective B, failed again. You’re tasked with heading to the Pyramidion for a map. Surprise surprise, the map is not there, but you do get a “spot” in the Forest that your NPC allies can help you get to.

Objective C, go to Infinite Forest to nab the map. Failed! It’s too big! Go kill some Vex on Nessus because that’ll help you… I don’t know, narrow your search results or something. Done! Now your AI companions can, for some reason, locate the big boss creature that has been ruining Osiris’ day for who knows how long at this point because time travel is wacky!

At this point we finally get to fight the big bad boss baddie, whose name I don’t even care to google right now. It’s vaguely Greek. Starts with a P. Anyway, the encounter is actually a lot of fun as it tends to spam you with a lot more enemies than you may usually be used to but I play a Stormcaller warlock which I consider the “fuck this entire room” of character ultimates so I blew through it without too much trouble. Osiris himself shows up… sort of, in the form of more reflections (though I think he was personally there at the end) but overall he was just a mechanic to the fight rather than an active helper. He would occasionally stop the boss from basically de-syncing you (text speak for MURDER) from the simulation so that you can get some good hits in, ultimately defeating the boss.

Boss defeated, Vex generic doomsday plan foiled, onward to generic planetary adventures, reaching the new level cap of 25 (which is kind of pointless by the way as there are no new abilities in skilltrees and mostly just functions as a new tier to get the new “illuminated” engrams which could have been done a different way), and the gear grind begins anew on the road to your 330′s and 335′s.

Before all of that, I just found navigating this “Infinite Forest” incredibly boring. Every mission was just recycled architecture that got to the point where I could easily predict certain enemy spawns. When unlocking doors there would always be three basic enemies of a certain enemy faction waiting to greet you, and this happened several times, like some designer had some line of code of “spawn 3 basics here” and they kept copy/pasting the first module after every door you entered.

Pre-fucked Mercury was nice to see with nice, wheat filled meadows with slick “Precursor” Vex wandering around in shinier outfits than you might have been used to.

After that the game just throws some “do these adventures” on Mercury, new engrams to acquire and a whole set of Vex-themed gear to acquire. There’s a Mercury faction you can throw even more tokens at. Presumably there’s some new strikes but I’ve yet to queue in them for a while in fear of being forced to go through Savathűn’s Song one more goddamn fucking time. (I don’t hate the strike, it’s just the only one I ever see).

So, y’know. More content, if you can stomach burning through a generic story with generic people in it.

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