Sorry, but I haven't yet shared the information about myself that would typically display here. Check back later to see if that changes, or if I instead choose to remain an enigma.
Step 1: Observe huge beard and ludicrous hair. Accept need to change.
Step 2: Hack away at beard.
Step 3: Be sure to leave a careful amount of manly stubble. This is essential in the period between beard-shaving and hair-cutting, particularly if - like me - you have a tendency to look slightly feminine with long hair but without beard.
Step 4: Get hair cut properly. End of homeless-esque days.
The Path came out yesterday, to a venerable force of Angry Internet Men, lying in wait. And an equally enthusiastic bulge of fanatics, defending its beauty at every turn. The result is as follows: the internet has exploded.
I must say, I never expected The Path to generate such enormous and heated debate. It's a tiny little indie game from Belgium. And the whole world is going on about it.
As a quick aside, this week's Zero Punctuation over at Escapist is probably the funniest one he's done in a long time. Czech it out.
It's funny. I never talk about film on here. I probably have more authority to do so than games, what with me studying film and all, but it's something I tend to keep very academic. I really should voice my views a bit more. After all, prolific film philosopher Aaron Meskin praised my ideas about the notion of movie authorship during a workshop yesterday, which made me feel all fuzzy. How pathetic am I?
From the top-right of the site, just now:
Check out a selection from our database of more than 5000 reviews! has weighed in on for the and figures it rates out of 10.
I'd forgotten how fast it was. It's a criminally long time since I played Quake III Arena, iD Software's seminal year-2000 multiplayer shooter. In that near-decade break, games have slowed down. Even the hectic fragging of Team Fortress 2 feels glacial by comparison. This is ridiculous.
Quake Live is Quake III. Simple as. Not Quake III in a browser, even; that it feeds off Firefox or IE is completely incidental. After you register, the game downloads to your hard drive as you complete the mandatory training and matchmaking arenas, and once you're playing, there's no way of telling this from the next FPS. It's full-screen, high-resolution and (relatively) high detail. I can find no significant differences between this and the original product.
As much as I love The Maw, there's a constant feeling eating away at me that nearly £10 is pushing it a bit. Two hours of linear chomping leaves little desire to return, even considering its monumental entertainment value. Portal got away with this length, partly because it was The Official Best Game In Ages (what was I thinking when I 8/10'd it?), and partly because it was primarily sold in a package that also included a very strong collection of far lengthier games. I'm a real advocate of shorter, sweeter entertainment - but you have to be realistic about what you charge for it, particularly in these times of banker fuck-ups and stretches of pennilessness.
Tale of Tales' ambitious sandbox wanderer comes out on Wednesday. It's an unusual release date, chosen as it marks the tenth anniversary of developers Michael Samyn and Auriea Harvey's first meeting.
The Path is a brilliantly insane game. It pushes the boundaries so far that I'd have almost liked it to be even more insane. It's a game where you guide six iterations of Little Red Riding Hood to their untimely deaths at the hands of a variety of "wolves", in increasingly messed-up conditions. It's only $9.99 on Steam, and it's a game everyone should really try out. Even if it's not to your liking, it's hardly a huge waste of money.