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Title: Diablo III release date! (not really)
Posted: March 12, 2011 (08:14 PM)
Here’s something I found on my computer from early-mid 2009. Basically – after doing a good amount of research – a Diablo fan concluded that the release date for Diablo III is going to be 09/09/09. Obviously this person was way off considering it is 2011 and the game still doesn’t have a release date. The following is the original post from 2009 that wrongly predicted the release date . I just found the amount of work that went it to be quite amusing. It’s one of a few reasons why I prefer not to worry about such matters and just wait for them to naturally unfold.
Please, don't judge this before you read it through and think about it! I finally, after several months of extensive research have found the true secret that Diablo carries. Please bare with me.
Believe it or not but the secret of diablo 3 is within the Dol rune. By now, you are all probably thinking wtf this guy is trolling. But before you discredit me let me show to you this jaw-dropping truth. The stats of a Dol rune:
Weapons: Hit causes monster to flee 25%
Armor: Replenish Life +7
Helms: Replenish Life +7
Shield: Replenish Life +7
Some simple mathematics:
25x7x7x7 = 8575
Why Is this important you ask?
Well. In diablo 1, the lord of terror had PRECISLY 8,575 hit points. Are you getting scared? There's more
Note the stat on the dol rune that stands out the most, "Hit causes monster to flee 25%" Now, naturally this ONLY works on regular monsters but not bosses ... right?
That's were you are wrong. In diablo II "normal" difficulty has PRECISLY 34300 Hit points ( 8575 being exactly 25% of his health!)
What does this mean to us? Well, because of some glitch in the hardcoding of d2:lod this fact somehow allows you to surpasse the boundary of "hit causes monster to flee" not affecting bosses. In otherwords, because of this fault on behalf of the blizzard programmers aslong as you have a dol socketed into a weapon you can make diablo run away from you with each successfull hit. Ironic isn't it? The lord of terror, in TERROR. ( Some argue this was initially an intentional "easter-egg" the programmers added for a twist)
Okay... okay. After making you read all of this I won't disappoint you. There is indeed an even greater scandal revolving around the dol rune. One that will literally make you $!@% bricks after reading this. Let's move on!
Anagrams. Guess what? An anagram of "Dol" is Lod. Coincidence? Lod stands for Lord Of Destruction which is an expansion for diablo. An anagram of Lord Of Destruction is: consider fold trout.
Consider fold trout ...
For months these words echoed in my head and it wasn't untill tonight I realised what impact these words bare and I felt compelled to type out this thread and share it with you all.
I quote Merriam websters: Quote TROUT Middle English, from Old English trÅ«ht, from Late Latin trocta, tructa, a fish with sharp teeth, from Greek trÅ¨ktÄ“s, literally, gnawer, from trÅ¨gein to gnaw Please notice the word gnaw.
I knew I had seen this very word somewhere in the game before, but where? Gnaw Fold. It was a rare ring I had left in my stash since 1.07. According to recent databases, the prefix Gnaw and the suffix Fold no longer exist, however they did in 1.07. I was one of the lucky few to recieve this ring randomly from as far as my memory serves me, from the gidbin quest. Enough about the ring, let me explain to you all how this fits together... PERFECTLY.
Gnaw Fold - Unique ring stats:
Attack rating +25
Do you see the similarities yet? Well, if you don't than look back at are old friend the dol rune.
Quote The stats of a Dol rune:
Weapons: Hit causes monster to flee 25%
Armor: Replenish Life +7
Helms: Replenish Life +7
Shield: Replenish Life +7
Admit it, you are scared? This is where this little discovery takes a VERY, VERY awkward and interesting turn.
They're three difficulties on d2 'Normal', 'Nightmare' and 'Hell' In the "Hell" mode of diablo lod, diablo has a 0.05575% chance of dropping a Dol rune. Why Is this important? Apart from the scary number-patterns this tells us that JUST as with the dol rune glitch that allowed you to make diablo flee from you, here a very simliar glitch occurs. Once again, because of the "Sloppy Hardcoding" of D2 LOD (Mind, it was a rush job after the sky-rocketing sales of classic) whenever you kill diablo in hell with this ring in your ring slot the game crashes. I bet you all are thinking now, WOW what a waste of time! He made us read ALL of this to tell us that because of the incompetence of blizzard employee's the game crashes if you wear some really rare ring and just HAPPEN to get a dol rune drop for you. This is wrong. As you will find out in just a sec there is something special about this error message. It returns the following value to your screen: 64 69 61 62 6c 6f 20 33 20 20 30 39 2f 30 39 2f 30 39.
At first glace 64 69 61 62 6c 6f 20 33 20 20 30 39 2f 30 39 2f 30 39 seems completly random, just some error code right? This is where you are wrong, deeply wrong.
64 69 61 62 6c 6f 20 33 20 20 30 39 2f 30 39 2f 30 39 is hex for : Diablo 3 09/09/09. Don't believe me? Google ANY Hex translator and try it yourself.
From this ASTONISHING information I would like to conclude that based on my findings I believe (and believe all you others should acknowledge aswell) that diablo 3's official release date is 09/09/09.
DISCLAIMER: PLEASE, BEFORE FLAMING / DISAGREEING READ THROUGH THE WHOLE THREAD! YOU WILL SEE MY FINDINGS ARE FLAWLESS.
Title: My top 3 reviews from each round
Posted: August 11, 2009 (10:40 PM)
1. Madworld by Suskie
2. Prototype by True
3. Mr. Nutz by Zigfried
1. Dragon Knight by Zigfried
2. Metroid Fusion by Bluberry
3. LittleBigPlanet by Suskie
1. PO'ed by Bluberry
2. Call of Juarez by Venter
3. Farenheight by Emp
1. Desert Crisis by RadicalDreamer
2. Bad Dudes by Wolfqueen
3. Eternal Darkness by Suskie
1. Mid-Garts by Zigfried
2. Gunvalkyrie by Bluberry
3. Dead Rising by Janus
1. Quake 3 by Emp
2. Stalin vs Martians by DoI
3. A.P.B by Woodhouse
1. Scythe by Bluberry
2. Space Invaders by Janus
3. Resident Evil 5 by True
Title: Memories of GUTS: Drakengard
Posted: August 02, 2009 (11:41 AM)
Zig did one so I'll do one, too.
Sometime in 2004 reviewer Falshead wrote a retarded review for Drakengard that basically said the game is mediocre because of all the neat extra stuff it offers that puts it ahead of other games in the genre. Then GUTS wrote his own response to the review and used his version in the Team Tourney. He was part of the infamous Chaos Legion with captain Zig and Overdrive and this review was his only win of the tourney. Dark Fact, Fix, and Schultz were the judges. I'm not sure who he was up against (think it was Skinny Puppy but not 100%) but DF and Fix voted for it and ASchultz voted against it. It has become a cult classic around here.
Here it is!
Drakengard just plain fucking sucks, lets go ahead and get that out there and on the table so we can talk about it. Pretend Drakengard’s suckness is like your AIDS infested daughter. Let’s say her name is Sophie, and she has just told you she has an STD of the brain that makes her act like a stupid fucking snatch and talk out of her ass like an ass puppet. Now you’re gonna have to deal with it. And deal with it we will, but first I’ll get the good points out of the way.
This genre is love it or hate it. You either completely get why playing one man against hundreds of enemies, mashing your attack button until your thumb is sore, and leveling up weapons and your character over and over is insanely fun, or you find it monotonous and bash the genre. Drakengard adds to the mix by giving you free flying 3D shooting levels on the back of a dragon, and allowing you to jump on the back of the dragon while on the ground for some low altitude destruction. It also brings an insanely cool story, 70 different weapons, and that Square polish to the overall presentation.
The graphics are pretty good, which makes me feel a little better about Square-Enix mugging me for $40. The outdoor environments have you kicking ass through every type of terrain imaginable, save a jungle setting, and give the game enough variety so that continuously pounding soldiers into the ground really never gets old. Some look really good, some are mediocre, but all are leagues above stuff like Dynasty Warriors. The indoor environments are really nice looking and very consistently cool to explore, especially towards the end of the game when you explore the really big castles.
That’s all the good, now on to the TERRIBLE!
My reviewer’s obligation forced me to play through all 100% of this game. That’s 60% fun, 40% PURE GODAWFUL AGONY! Because, you see, this game has the audacity and the unmitigated GALL to give you not only five different endings, but over 70 weapons, intense action, and literally thousands upon thousands of enemies to kill! What a crock of shit! That’s like if God gave me six inches of boner, then he’s like “oh shit son, here’s a trinity of three more inches, blessedly go to town my holy little nigglet!” Fuck that!
Here’s the deal; everything was going great at first, I was cruising along, just lovin’ it McDonald’s style. The music was pumping hard, high pitched guitars wailing while kick drums rattled my apartment. Basically I was stoked like a Mexican with a fat, ugly white girlfriend. Then a horrible, horrible thing happened: I beat the fucking game! Here’s my exact thought process as I vocalized it on that dark, evil day (I generally always record myself playing games)-
Me- Whoa YEAH dogimus, this is the HIZZZEAT on REPEAT!
(sounds of hardcore weapon fighting in the background, buttons being mashed, me panting and singing some lyrics I made up to the background music)
Me- This must be the last boss! Hell yeah!
(a few more minutes of furious passion, then silence as I watch the ending)
Me- Huh, what the hell is this crap? That was only 70% of the game? YOU MEAN THEY INCLUDED 4 MORE ENDINGS THAT COMPLETELY RULE AND TONS MORE WEAPONS FOR ME TO FIND??!!!
(sounds of my controller being crammed in my dog’s anus)
Me- Oh my GOD, there’s even tons more new levels to play?!! GOD I HATE THIS GAME!!
My black neighbor- Yo yo yo, where da welfare office at nigga?
(sounds of phone number being dialed)
Me- Hello, animal control? Yeah I got a silverback here that needs tranquilizing.
That pretty much sums up my disgust with Drakengard. They ruined a perfectly good and awesome game by including all that extra stuff. Had they just stopped at the first generic and cheesy ending, I would have loved it! But no, they had to give me three more endings which progressively get cooler and cooler and completely fucked up (we’re talking giant man-eating babies being birthed from a city sized pregnant god fucked up), and one ending that is hilarious and a total surprise! Plus they practically FORCED me at gas powered dildo-point to find all the weapons just to get that fifth ending. And get this, the game was CHALLENGING but not too hard and never cheap. What the fucking hell?!
So basically if you want a game that gives you tons of fun, a kickass unique storyline with multiple endings that are completely different, two different game modes, 70 different weapons, and tons of replay value, then get Drakengard. But if you want a game that it is actually good, then don’t!
Title: So someone gave me a free DS...
Posted: April 17, 2009 (08:24 AM)
Are there any games on this thing that someone who hates handhelds would enjoy? Or should I just give it away to someone else who would get more use out of it than me?
I've played New Super Mario Bros and that's about it. Feel free to recommend me anything else.
Title: Here's the Zigfried post I promised!
Posted: January 03, 2009 (09:15 AM)
Since he won yet another tourney I'd like to present my ten favorite Zigfried reviews! I probably missed some but here are my ten favorites in reverse order. Read them all if you haven't already!
10. Kimi ga Nozomu Eien – The only appearance of Hentai on this list! I usually prefer Zig’s other reviews over his hentai ones but this one stands above the rest.
9. GUN – Brilliant approach and I don’t know of a review that tackles a middle of the road game any better.
8. Fist of the North Star - It’s long, goes on tangents, but I’d be damned if a more enthusiastic review exists. Great humor, and despite its length it’s very re-readable.
7. Dead or Alive Xtreme 2 - Hilarious review for a game that I (and most people) wouldn’t want to read about otherwise. It actually almost made me want to play it.
6. Kiaidan 00 - Takes the best elements of Zig’s reviews and puts them all together. Brilliant.
5. God of War - Doesn’t have the wackiness of Zig’s other greats but that wasn’t necessary here. Straightforward, to the point, and powerful piece here that is easily the best God of War review written anywhere.
4. El Viento - How can anyone not want to play the game after reading this review? Zig’s passion for this game really shines.
3. Dark castle – Quite possibly the best bash review I’ve ever read. Enough said.
2. Mid-Garts – Flawlessly written. After reading it I still don’t know whether the game is good or not but I really want to play it. It was better off with the ?/10 score but that’s a very minor nitpick. Zig’s best Wolf Team review.
1. Emerald Dragon - If I remember correctly Zig’s first tournament win! One of the best intros and conclusions in any review I’ve ever read, and the rest of the review is good enough to make the game sound interesting to someone who doesn't care for this type of game.
Title: Sportsman's 100 favorite games of all time
Posted: August 24, 2008 (12:13 PM)
I posted this on the Turbo board yesterday so some of you have probably already seen this. I already want to swap some games around so it's not 100% accurate but good enough.
I'm mostly a PC gamer so this might seem a little biased in that direction.
100. World in Conflict
99. The Lost Vikings
98. Sunset Riders
97. No One Lives Forever
96. System Shock II
95. Team Fortress 2
94. World of Goo
93. Zelda II
92. Chrono Cross
91. Monkey Island 2
90. Halo 2
89. Warcraft II
87. Alpha Centauri
86. Super Mario World 2
85. Crysis Warhead
84. Aladdin (Genesis)
83. Cadillacs & Dinosaurs
82. Ogre Battle 64
81. F-Zero X
80. Project Gotham Racing 4
79. Final Fantasy Tactics
78. Supreme Commander
77. Shining Force 2
76. Dragon Warrior IV
75. Freedom Force
74. Left 4 Dead
73. Twisted Metal 2
72. Super Star Soldier
71. Shinobi 3
70. Madden 2004
69. Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal
68. Call of Duty: United Offensive
67. Half Life 2: Episode 2
66. Warhammer: Dawn of War
65. The Longest Journey
64. Mega Man X2
63. Planescape: Torment
62. El Viento
61. Diablo II
60. Super C
59. Serious Sam the Second Encounter
58. Castlevania: Symphony of the Night
57. Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic
56. Jak and Daxter
55. Starcraft Brood War
54. Metal Slug 3
53. Civilization 4
52. The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening
51. Crash Bandicoot: Warped
50. Giants: Citizen Kabuto
49. Panzer Dragoon Orta
48. Rayman 2
47. Ocarina of Time
46. No One Lives Forever 2
45. Donkey Kong Country 2
44. Baldur's Gate 2
43. Super Mario Bros 3
42. Thief 2: The Metal Age
41. Twinkle Tale
39. Age of Mythology
38. Sonic & Knuckles
37. Call of Duty
36. Rise of Nations
35. Mega Man X
34. TIE Fighter
33. Call of Duty 4
32. Unreal Tournament 2004
31. Red Alert 2
30. Thief: Dark Project
29. Metal Slug X
28. Sonic 2
27. Sam & Max Hit the Road
26. Half Life 2
25. Mars Matrix
24. Fallout 2
23. Company of Heroes
22. Civilization 2
21. Starseige Tribes
19. Betrayal at Krondor
18. Rome: Total War
17. Mechwarrior 2
16. Freespace 2
15. Age of Kings
14. Lightening Force
13. DOOM II
11. Super Metroid
10. Contra Hard Corps
8. Splinter Cell Chaos Theory
7. Total Annihilation
6. Star Control 2
5. The Legend of Zelda
4. Super Mario World
3. X-Com: UFO Defense
2. Deus Ex
1. Unreal Tournament
Title: Half Life 2 level by level analysis, part 2
Posted: July 13, 2008 (02:26 PM)
Now I’ll take care of Episode 1 and Episode 2. Keep in mind this is loaded with spoilers so don’t read unless you’ve played the games or don’t mind having them spoiled.
Undue Alarm – Our Benefactors was an amazing level, and even though this is pretty much the same I didn’t care for it at all. What amazed me most about the series is how each level offers something different. Developer commentary made me appreciate this one more but this is more of the same and just didn’t impress me this time around. 5/10
Direct Intervention – Yes ANOTHER blue gravity gun level that also didn’t impress me. Enough already! However I liked this one better than the last and seeing the pre-combine soldiers at the end was pretty cool. 6/10
Lowlife – Zombies galore! The inclusion of the Zombines was cool because if you’re not careful they can obliterate you and it’s about time the series hints at a challenge. Finally we get weapons and shining the flashlight on the enemies was cool though it doesn’t beat fighting them yourself. I just wish they fixed the flashlight problem before the game was released instead of Episode 2 since sprinting while your flashlight is on usually wasn’t an option unless you don’t mind it running out of battery after a few seconds. Fending off the zombies in the darkness while waiting for the elevator was awesome, though. Better, but not there yet. 7/10
Urban Fight – Here we go. Nothing too original about this level but we’re finally introduced to a level that feels like it could’ve been in Half Life 2. I loved how the antlions were added and the pushing cars was a lot of fun. Alyx sniping while you raid buildings was sweet, since you’re finally teamed up with a somewhat competent ally. Once again we have a nice zombie showdown in the hospital (with combine!), though I was starting to get sick of them by the end of the level. 8/10
Exit 17 – The escort mission is probably the best I've ever seen in a game, but it's still an escort mission and semi-tedious. The strider showdown at the end is outstanding and easily the most exciting moment of the game. It kinda makes Episode One worth it. 8/10
To The White Forest – Too many antlions! A pretty straightforward mission that isn’t so memorable though the cave was a pretty cool setting. The inclusion of the green antlions was great, since they almost brought a challenge. On hard they can obliterate you in seconds plus they stand back so you can’t tear them down with a shotgun that easily. 6/10
The Vortal Coil – More antlions (and zombies!) but an improvement over the last mission. Defending the base was cool although super easy once you know what you’re doing and how it works. I also loved teaming up with the vortigaunt even though I wish it came with a muzzle. Another rehash, but some moments such as what I just mentioned and running from cave to cave from the antlion queen made this one the better and more memorable level of the two. 8/10
Freeman Pontifex – There are great battles here, ranging from the antlion showdown with the gravity gun to fighting the zombies in the house and much more. The problem is this is another example of “been here, done that”. Nothing is new; we’re already crossed antlion filled areas, fought rooms full of zombies, crossed acid, etc. 7/10
Riding Shotgun – Here we go, this is the beginning of what is perhaps the greatest streak in any Half Life game to date. Although short it is definitely one of the most action packed and eventful levels in the series. There are so many epic moments here, from confronting Hunters for the first time to witnessing the actual combine to running from all of their forces. This level truly gives you the feeling that you’re constantly being chased (which you are). Every second of this one is epic. 10/10
Under The Radar – What starts off as just a good level becomes spectacular by the end. Clearing out the turrets while avoiding zombies was fun, but the atmosphere truly takes over after that. I was afraid that this would turn into a boring driving level but as soon as things get too quiet you’re ambushed and involved in one of the most intense battles yet. The bit at the end with Dog and the strider is also epic. 9/10
Our Mutual Fiend - I don’t want to say too much but this contains the greatest battle in any Half Life game to date. It’s also the only part that I had to restart two or three times that wasn’t because of Alyx getting killed by zombies. Kudos to Valve! 10/10
T-Minus One - There isn't any actual gameplay here but it really makes me want to play Episode 3 when it comes out in 2015.
Title: Half Life 2 level by level analysis
Posted: June 06, 2008 (09:45 AM)
I haven't checked the blogs in about an hour so hopefully this one didn't get stolen. Maybe I'll do more some other time but I'm done for now.
Point Intersection – Sets the tone for the game. No action so I won’t give it a rating but works better than the first level in Half Life.
A Red Letter Day – Still not an actual level. Once again does a good job at setting the tone and the rendezvous with Kleiner and Barney and Eli Vance was cool.
Route Kanal – A pretty standard level here. Great atmosphere and introduction but pretty average for the most part. Not bad but not one I’ll be replaying too much. 6/10
Water Hazard – This one is updated from the first comment. Sure, it's super long and at the end I was glad it was over but the level of intensity is unmatched. This is one of the most exciting levels in the game and the last third especially is memorable. 8/10
Black Mesa East – Once again not an actual level but a neat introduction to the gravity gun.
Ravenholm – One of the best levels in the game. Using the gravity gun on everything is so much fun and there are so many ways to play this one. Too bad you use the gravity gun more in this level than the rest of the game (minus the last two levels) because Valve were really on to something here. The ending is less than spectacular but it doesn’t stop this one from being one o the game’s best. 10/10
Highway 17 – A bit on the long side but filled with exciting moments. Shooting down the chopper on the bridge is a classic moment as was being ambushed in the “abandoned” villages and running over antlion after antlion. A lot of people I know didn’t like this level but it’s one of my favorites. 9/10
Sandtraps – The first part of the level is decent but forgettable, the second part is torture (though now I'm starting to appreciate running from antlions on sand) and the final third is outstanding. The Nova Prospekt assault with antlions on your side is one of the greatest moments of the game. Too bad that’s like 30 minutes into the level. 8/10
Nova Prospekt – Using the bug seed really makes this level a blast to play. A bit on the easy side thanks to the antlions doing most of the work but seeing them eat the combine to death and kamikaze into turrets is priceless. Tight corridors work in this setting but the antlions trapping me started to annoy me halfway through. It was annoying but didn't ruin the level how AI ruined an upcoming one. 8/10
Entanglement – Brilliant. The turret parts are among the game’s best, even though I found a completely cheap way to win one of them. This is one of the most replayable levels and still remains one of the most fun. 10/10
Anticitizen One – Starts off pretty cool with the thought of you controlling your squad, but loses some of its charm once you realize that your squad consists of a bunch of idiots that work against you more than helping you. The game isn’t hard at all but they made it a lot more difficult than it should’ve been, by trapping me in doorways and making a big deal when I tried to be quiet. The hoppers are a lot of fun to use and the level is actually pretty good but they bring it down quite a bit. 6/10
Follow Freeman – Basically a more epic version of Anticitizen One. The striders are awesome, too bad the AI made the last battle so much more difficult by blocking the stairs at the last encounter. Still bad AI moments though not as many since the level is more open and you can sort of ignore them. Otherwise this level is ace and one of the most epic in any Half Life game to date. Plus the beginning with the snipers is hilarious how they just shoot at the windows with their machine gun from far away and then get nailed. Priceless. 9/10
Our Benefactors – Just when the game was slowing down a little it picks up again. Not as much fun to replay as some levels but using the blue gravity gun is so much fun at first. Incredibly intense, and the ending with the elevator and strider is absolutely great. 10/10
Dark Energy – Cool ending sequence with an intense final battle, though not as intense as it could’ve been because it’s too short and easy. At least the blue gravity gun is back; I didn’t want to get rid of the thing. 8/10
Title: Music of 2008!
Posted: June 01, 2008 (12:25 PM)
Haven't listened to much but I'm going to post it anyways.
CONSOLERS OF THE LONELY - The Raconteurs (8)
A PERFECT PLACE - Mike Patton (7) (technically a soundtrack but whatever)
RED ALBUM - Weezer (7)
THIRD - Portishead (7)
PROFESSOR SATCHAFUNKILUS... - Joe Satriani (7)
ACCELERATE - REM (7)
READ EMOTIONAL TRASH - Stephen Malkmus & the Jicks (6)
ROBERT POLLARD IS OFF TO BUSINESS - Robert Pollard (6)
SLEEP THROUGH THE STATIC - Jack Johnson (6)
NARROW STAIRS - Death Cab for Cutie (6)
THE ODD COUPLE - Gnarls Barkley (6)
TROUBLE IN DREAMS - Destroyer (5)
KONK - The Kooks (5)
AT MOUNT ZOOMER - Wolf Parade (5)
GHOSTS I - IV - Nine Inch Nails (5)
VAMPIRE WEEKEND - Vampire Weekend (4)
HERETIC PRIDE - The Mountain Goats (4)
RABBIT HABITS - Man Man (4)
FLOAT - Flogging Molly (4)
THE DREAMERS - John Zorn (4)
WALK IT OFF - Tapes 'n Tapes (3)
Title: Music of 2007: FINAL
Posted: February 07, 2008 (11:42 AM)
It's about time I put this up. Forgot all about it until Genj's post reminded me.
NEON BIBLE - Arcade Fire: 9
ICKY THUMP - White Stripes: 9
SOMEWHERE IN THE BETWEEN - Streetlight Manifesto: 9
GA GA GA GA GA - Spoon: 9
WE WERE DEAD BEFORE THE SHIP EVEN SANK - Modest Mouse: 8
BEYOND - Dinosaur Jr: 8
FEAR OF A BLANK PLANET - Porcupine Tree: 8
STRAWBERRY JAM - Animal Collective: 8
YEAR OF THE CROW - State Radio: 8
MAGIC - Bruce Springsteen: 8
IN RAINBOWS - Radiohead: 8
BLUEFINGER - Frank Black: 8
NO WORLD FOR TOMORROW - Coheed and Cambria: 8
THE MAGIC POSITION - Patrick Wolf: 8
AW II - Ataxia: 8
NEW MOON - Elliott Smith: 7
PERSON PITCH - Panda Bear: 7
ALONE - Rivers Cuomo: 7
OUR LOVE TO ADMIRE - Interpol: 7
MYTH TAKES - !!!: 7
CHALLENGERS - The New Pornographers: 7
ECHOES, SILENCE, PATIENCE AND GRACE: Foo Fighters: 7
GRADUATION - Kanye West: 7
ERA VULGARIS - Queens of the Stone Age: 7
WINCING THE NIGHT AWAY - The Shins: 7
EARDRUM - Talib Kweli: 7
LEAVES IN THE RIVER: Sea Wolf: 7
ALL OF A SUDDEN I MISS EVERYONE: Explosions in the Sky: 7
HISSING FAUNA, ARE YOU THE DESTROYER? - Of Montreal: 7
AMERICAN GANGSTER - Jay-Z: 6
ZILTOID - Devin Townsend: 6
FRIEND AND FOE - Menomena: 6
SKY BLUE SKY - Wilco: 6
UNDER THE BLACKLIGHT - Rilo Kiley: 6
TREES OUTSIDE THE ACADEMY - Thurston Moore: 6
CARRY ON - Chris Cornell: 6
RANDOM SPIRIT LOVER - Sunset Rubdown: 5
ZEITGEIST - Smashing Pumpkins: 5
THERE'S NO 666 IN OUTERSPACE - Hella: 5
LA CUCARACHA - Ween: 5
ANONYMOUS - Tomahawk: 5
LIVING WITH THE LIVING - Ted Leo & the Pharmacists: 5
IT WON'T BE SOON BEFORE LONG - Maroon 5: 5
LBERTAD - Velvet Revolver: 5
THE BIRD AND THE BEE - The Bird and the Bee: 5
SNAKES & ARROWS - Rush: 5
ARMCHAIR APOCRYPHA - Andrew Bird: 5
MYTHMAKER - Skinny Puppy: 5
FAVOURITE WORST NIGHTMARE - Arctic Monkeys: 4
CRYOTOGRAMS - Deerhunter: 4
YOURS TRULY, ANGRY MOB - Kaiser Chiefs: 4
FRIEND OPPORTUNITY: Deerhoof: 4
MONKEYS FOR NOTHIN' AND THE CHIMPS FOR FREE - Reel Big Fish: 4
BUILD A NATION - Bad Brains: 4
LIBERATION - Talib Kweli & Madlib: 4
MINUTES TO MIDNIGHT - Linkin Park: 3
YEAR ZERO - Nine Inch Nails: 3
DRUMS & GUNS: Low: 3
A WEEKEND IN THE CITY - Block Party: 3
INFINITY ON HIGH - Fall Out Boy: 2
SHOCK VALUE - Timbaland: 2
Title: I can make a TT entry too!
Posted: August 18, 2007 (11:55 PM)
It's 2 in the morning so I hope this makes sense.
Every two years or so the review scene seems to change. In 2000 (from what I hear) big paragraphs was what made one great. During the "golden age" in 2002 detailed writing and longer reviews was the way to go. This changed in 2004-2005 when short and to the point was the most effective. My peak was probably 2005 and 2006 because that's my style.
Here's something I realized while reading over some of the critiques thus far:
Now creativity/originality and personality seem what the judges are looking for the most. So far in the tourney I'm getting criticized for what I've been praised for in the past; I was praised for brevity and directness and now my reviews are being called too direct and dry. The reason my Call of Duty review one in round 2 was because it's my only review with personality besides CC, which was something that was great at the time because of the CC praise/bash that was going on and died shortly after. So my point is that times change, and I won't be able to pull the same shit for any longer.
What I'm getting from this is I need to write something new or else I'll lose next week, since my reviews are anything but creative and personal. Which means I need to start a review tomorrow and not the day before because it will never get done.
Posted: May 11, 2007 (11:40 PM)
DirectX 10 screenshots
I cannot wait.
Title: Reviews of 2006!
Posted: December 31, 2006 (08:04 PM)
I was going to go to Times Square this year to watch the ball drop, but I'm way too lazy. So I'm here making another list!
Here are the reviews I wrote in 2006, starting with the earliest. I've been semi-retired for about 4 months now, but hopefully I'll come up with something new soon.
A quick review for a quick game. That's all.
Super Mario RPG
A much needed rewrite of an old review from late 2002 for an overrated game. At least it beats the old one (I hope).
I don't even know why I wrote this one. It's nothing special and doesn't say much unless you're familiar with the series. I'm not going to remove it, but I don't like it at all.
What originally started out as a blog entry became a massive hit. This is mainly because it shup EmP and all of the CC haters up and resolved the whole situation. Feedback also suggested that it's one of my better reviews, and placed very high in the King of Reviews round.
I like my ideas in this one, but I feel I rushed parts of it. This was because it was for King of Reviews and I held it to the last minute. The judge of that round (who I can't remember at the moment) agreed with me.
I like some of the points I made in this review, but it's also very sloppy and also rushed. We've seen a lot of these from me this year.
A good, but not great review. I didn't receive as much feedback from this one as I did from my review for the first Halo, so I don't know what others think about it. I personaly liked my Halo review better since it said something that hasn't been said 100 times already.
Call of Duty
I personally think this is one of my better ones, but not everyone agrees with that. It was Lasthero's favorite review of the KoR round, and other people said it's one of my best reviews. Others said it ranges from decent to good. This one will always remain a mystery.
This one was for the sectioned review contest. I know I could've gone into more detail and done an overall better job, but I love my approach and thought it turned out okay. Ashy gave it a score somewhere in the low 90s, so at least I'm not alone with this one.
NFL Head Coach
I thought this would be a nice quick review, but based on feedback this is one of my best reviews yet. I was surprised at how well it turned out. Maybe it's because I have a passion for American Football, I dunno.
This one is from 2003, and I posted it and then soon removed it because it sucks. I tried to post it again under grassroots, but it was rejected. Go figure.
It's not the greatest, but a lot better than my old one. Plus another AC bash review never hurts.
Kirby's Dream Land 3
A quick, uninspired bash review for the Alphabetolympics. The judges seemed to agree with the uninspired part.
Hopefully I will write more in 2007!
Title: The FINAL music of 2006 list
Posted: December 26, 2006 (02:52 PM)
I still haven't listened to 2-3 albums that I wanted to, but I doubt they will seriously impact this list.
Eisenhower - The Slip: 9
Return to Cookie Mountain - TV on the Radio: 9
Stadium Arcadium - Red Hot Chili Peppers: 9
Black Holes and Revelations - Muse: 9
Game Theory - The Roots: 8
Us Against the Crown - State Radio: 8
Ys - Joanna Newsom: 8
Hip Hop is Dead - Nas: 8
I am Not Afraid of You and I Will Beat Your Ass - Yo La Tengo: 8
Close Calls with Brick Walls - Andrew WK: 8
Gang of Losers: The Dears: 8
Silent Shout - The Knife: 8
Whatever people say... - Arctic Monkeys: 8
Citrus - Asobi Seksu: 8
The Loon - Tapes N Tapes: 8 (2005)
As Far as the Eye Can See - People in Planes: 8
Peeping Tom - Peeping Tom: 7
Super Colossal: Joe Satriani: 7
A Matter of Life and Death - Iron Maiden: 7
Blood Mountain - Mastodon: 7
The Crane Wife - The Decemberists: 7
St. Elsewhere - Gnarls Barkley: 7
Synchestra - Devin Townsend: 7
Broken Boy Soldiers - The Raconteurs: 7
Pearl Jam - Pearl Jam: 7
Light Grenades - Incubus: 7
Air Stereo - The Damnwells: 7
American V - Johnny Cash: 7
Show Your Bones - YYY: 7
The Pick of Destiny - Tenacious D: 6
Revelations - Audioslave: 6
The Information - Beck: 6
Fox Confessor Brings the Flood - Neko Case: 6
Barenaked Ladies Are Me - Barenaked Ladies: 6
Rather Ripped - Sonic Youth: 6
Robbers & Cowards - Cold War Kids: 6
10,000 Days - Tool: 6
Rabbit Fur Coat - Jenny Lewis: 6
Modern Times - Bob Dylan: 6
Both Sides of the Sun - Ben Harper: 6
FutureSex/LoveSounds - Justin Timberlake: 6
Livin' it up - Sammy Hagar: 6
Feedback - Jurassic 5: 5
Sam's Town - The Killers: 5
The Eraser - Thom Yorke: 5
The Black Parade: My Chemical Romance: 5
The Future Crayon: Broadcast: 5
Ringleader... - Morrissey: 5
Eyes Open - Snow Patrol: 5
The Avalanche - Sufjan Stevens: 5
The Seeger Sessions - Bruce Springsteen: 5
The Life Pursuit - Belle and Sebastian: 4
Highway Companion - Tom Petty: 4
Endless Wire: The Who: 4
Permanent Revolution - Catch 22: 4
Get Lonely - The Mountain Goats: 4
Shine on - Jet: 4
Loose - Nelly Furtado: 4
Kingdom Come - Jay-Z: 4
On an Island - David Gilmour: 4
In with the Out Crowd - Less than Jake: 4
The Outsider - DJ Shadow: 4
Fast Man... - Frank Black: 4
Idlewild - Outkast: 4
Nightcrawler - Pete Yorn: 3
Amputecture - The Mars Volta: 3
First Impressions... - The Strokes: 3
At War... - The Flaming Lips: 3
Wolfmother - Wolfmother: 2
Who the Fuck are the Arctic Monkeys (EP) - Arctic Monkeys: 2
Snakes on a Plane Soundtrack: 2
Posted: October 02, 2006 (09:24 PM)