The Witcher (PC) review"There's a lovely quality to The Witcher's atmosphere, stemming from a combination of lush art design and the gripping plot on offer. It suffers from occasional pacing issues -- chapter one in particular requires a horrific amount of to-ing and fro-ing before it gets to the point -- but it's delivered in a generally satisfying, urgent and compelling way, driving the player to press on with the journey through Temeria. It certainly feels a lot more focused than some of its next-gen peers, which will relieve those who found themselves wandering around Oblivion's vastness with little clue of what was unfolding around them." |
Aeons ago, when I was all but a wee nipper, my high school biology teacher told us a rather crass joke about pubic hair. I remember it more for having to explain it to the half-witted group of girls sitting in front of me than for its actual comedy value, but it stuck in my mind nevertheless. It came about after a discussion regarding the increasing number of people opting to colour their hair ginger, and went a little something like this:
How can you check if a girl's a real redhead?
Ask her mother.
Anyway, I was reminded of this joke a couple of hours into The Witcher. After saving the life of a ginger hottie by concocting a bizarre potion for her to drink, she invited me to test out the sturdiest bed in the land. Clearly, I accepted her proposal, and had the chance to see whether or not the carpet matched the curtains...
It most certainly did not.
Why, that's a mighty fine pussy you've got between your legs...
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Freelance review by Lewis Denby (October 16, 2008)
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